I am not sure how much I have written about food and my relationship with food. I think I briefly touched on it here and there. Basically, I use food as a comforting tool. If I feel sad or stressed out, I turn to food, have since I was young. And its usually foods that are not healthy, like cheese burgers, fries, chips, bread, sweets. I also love a good meal with tons of carbs, like fettuccine alfredo, pizza and bread sticks, fried calamari, deli sandwiches; you get the picture.
Well, having indulged in this for many years and going back and forth in weight for as many years, I have a fat tummy, which I like to affectionately call my food baby. Well, I am getting sick of my food baby, and it constantly getting smaller and bigger. So I started back on the diet I know works for me (Atkins) and am beginning the process of losing weight again.
One major thing that has prompted me to start again is that we are going on a trip back East to visit family and bury my husband's father. We leave in a little over a week, and I do not fit into many of my clothes. That's a problem.
Also, I would like to have some foods that are not on my diet while I am there and know that if I do not do anything about my weight now, I will only gain more weight while on vacation. And that will only make my food baby bigger, and it will be harder to fit in my clothes.
So my challenge is to face the feelings I have inside about feeling a "need' to eat crap to soothe myself. Yesterday was the first day of the diet, and I did well. Today, I needed to go to town to go food shopping. That was a little difficult because my local Target and supermarket make and sell food so they both smell like food, yummy foods like pizza and fried chicken, and bread and cookies and . . . well you get the point. All throughout both stores, I had to continually remind myself that I wanted to lose my food baby more than I wanted to eat the foods I was smelling, or more than I wanted to buy something that was full of carbs.
It seems to me that change requires a constant reminder to one's self that you want the change and why you want the change, and I do mean constantly. The reason for the constant-ness of this reminder is that human are creatures of habit, and those habits hold on hard unless they are fought against with inner reasons why change is wanted.
I am no master of this process; in fact, I would say I am quite a failure at this for any long periods of time. Yet I am trying it again. This time, I am working hard to not let any of the usual excuses leak through and get me to do something against my goal.
How do you deal with change? Do you avoid it (like I often do) or face it head on?
I am so appreciative of all of you who come here and read my thoughts. :)
I would LOVE to hear your thoughts, too!
First I am sorry to hear of your father-in-laws passing. I hope you and your husband are doing okay with this change.
ReplyDeleteI am fortunate to say that I do not have too many problems cutting back on food. I do start to get a little beachball growing down there from time to time but can cut back when needed. I do however have other issues that can get out of hand. Like yours my issues grow increasingly when I am stressed.
Change. Yep I don’t mind change so bring it on. That is what I tell people when change is suggested. Then I quickly get frustrated and question why we feel we need to change. I find as I get older that change is less and less appealing. Sometimes it is because I know the changes will not work. Sometimes it is because I like the way things are and at other times it is because I really don’t want to deal with all the added work change brings.
I rarely change jobs. I live in the same house we bought back in 1985, which is the first house we bought. My week is very structured and I have a morning routine that is pretty much unwavering. So maybe I am not so good with change,
But your blog entry is more about change that will have a good ending. Doing something to better yourself. Unfortunately I think I still struggle with this. Probably because I am use to resisting change. Often I need to have some kind of visual aid to remind me that progress is being made and to see an end result. Often this is in the form of a spread sheet or notes. Writing this got me thinking about your previous entry. Is it that writing the positive changes down, is forcing me to use the new brain and by using the new brain I can think logically about what the change will do to me?
So you are no more of a failure than I am. I read your blog and realize that when you do not succeed at your goal you do not give up. And often you look to see where you failed and then rework your change to try to avoid the same thing happening. It does not matter how many times you fail, what matters is how many times you try again. Trying again only needs to be one more time that the fails. (I know this last bit is a cliche, but it really is true.)
Lastly you say you are appreciative of all of you who come here and read your thoughts. I would like to say that I appreciate you writing them down. Your blog has become my favourite site and I look forward to seeing what you have written. My day is always brighter when I see you have a new entry, whether it is something I choose to respond to or not.
Thank you for your sympathetic words about my father-in-law.
DeleteYour comment, as always, made me think again on change and how I deal with it. I had to admit to myself that I do change things up at times and have handled it fairly well. I have changed jobs many times in my career, and all of those changes were by my hand; I chose to change jobs. I guess it all comes down to how much I want something, how much I am willing to put into it, how much I am willing to sacrifice for the good of the change.
I think you are definitely on to something when you wondered if writing down the positive changes you experience activates the new brain. Since that part of your brain is responsible for language, it seems kind of logical to think that writing something down would connect things together in a logical manner.
I wonder if our reactions to change are purely from the middle (emotional) part of the brain. You mentioned that you think that you sometimes avoid change because of all the extra work change requires. It made me think of scheduling. I was sure that sitting down and scheduling my life would be a HUGE hassle. But after have done it now for several weeks, I see that was am emotional response to change. It took a little bit of planning and setting it up but now its around 15 minutes each night. I think I was just scared.
Anyhoo- I really appreciate your thoughts!! I think your comment sparked a blog post. Thanks!!
You can delete this if you want. I have no other way to reach you and I just needed to say. You write a wonderful blog. Maybe because it is because you have very deep topics which intimidate others, but I do wish others would comment.
ReplyDeleteTake Care
Delete it? No, I can't see a reason I would delete any of our comments. :)
DeleteI am really glad that you enjoy my blog! I wonder how many other people actually read my blog. Its hard to tell. I like writing because it helps me think things through and look at my self, which can be hard for me sometimes.
Yeah, it would be cool if others would comment. It would be cool to get other people's thoughts and perspectives of the things we discuss here in the comment area.
Well, it is what it is! I'll keep writing regardless. :) HUGS!
Hee-hee-- Mistake in the first line of that comment---- I meant I would not see a reason to delete any of Your comments.
Delete